If you have been following Arcaro Boxing, then you know we are experiencing a time of immense change. With Coach Jeremy losing his mom, Boxer Sophia losing her nephew and Boxer Jen being diagnosed with brain cancer.
It’s a typical occurrence when a major event happens that an out pour of immediate support and connection happens. As the days go on everyone’s consciousness turns to daily life and many other important things.
Coach Jeremy was having the experience of feeling forgotten. At first he had an overwhelming amount of connection and support and then suddenly almost none. He felt alone in this experience until he heard about Jen also experiencing the same phenomena. Sophia’s family is also in the same ring.
It’s normal and it makes sense and I’d like for us to interrupt that normalcy a little and replace it with a steady and continued support through thought, little notes, gestures and little actions as months move on and we move away from the original events that occurred. If nothing else, get in here and train and enjoy all the community in the gym supporting one another.
So, I’m going to give you a little update now and continually send out updates so we can all support one another, stay connected and contribute to our community consistently. If any of you have had these types of experiences after big change or loss, please feel free to share!
Coach Jeremy! He lost his mom in an unexpected fashion. It wasn’t something he was prepared for and the out pour of support wasn’t something he was prepared for either. For a solid two weeks he had tons of texts, phone calls and visits and after the two weeks, almost none. He is going to go through a year of “firsts” It will be his first summer without his mom, first football season for his son without his mom. He will go through the ups and downs of school without being able to call her and tell her. He will experience holidays and birthdays for the first time with her missing. We can all be in his corner to support him as he goes through the grieving process by simply thinking about him and his family. Let him know you thought about him when you see him in the gym. Share your own experience. Or simply complain out loud when he’s kicking your butt in class!
Boxer Sophia! Her nephew, Dwone was the victim of a hate crime. The perpetrator specifically sought out gay men to target. Dwone’s friend and Dwone were shot to death only a few blocks from home after returning from the club. Sophia’s family fundraised for funeral expenses and had a huge out pour of community outrage and support. As the month’s move on, you can keep Sophia and her sister and their entire family in your thoughts. They are healing as they move through the grieving process. The legal process will take a long time and they will endure this process with all of us in their corner if we keep them in our conscious thoughts. When you see Sophia in the gym, give her a fist bump and a nod. Maybe share a thought or two.
Boxer Jen! It’s been a serious whirlwind. Jenny never likes to be the center of attention, nor does she care much for being in the spotlight. She took that all on beautifully for the past 4 weeks. You all really pitched in and help her have her dream of a pro fight before her forced retirement and you all have been instrumental in spreading the word to help her with outrageous medical bills. At first she was inundated with e-mails, texts and facebook messages. As we move further away, naturally all that slows down.
Her recovery is just beginning. She is exactly 2 weeks out from surgery and is learning how to rewire certain thinking processes and emotions because when a tumor is removed, so is part of the brain. Please keep her in your thoughts, when you see her in the gym, give her a fist bump, a nod, just a simple gesture! Keep sharing the following fundraising link (http://www.gofundme.com/Help-Jen-fight) and stay tuned for future medical fundraising events we will do!
The hardest thing for folks on the outside can sometimes be not knowing what to say. Honestly in that case, the best thing to do is come right out and say, “I don’t know what to say!”
You know I’m going to link this up to boxing, so here it goes!
When a boxer is training for a fight or loses a fight, no one knows what to say or do. It’s hard to know “how to be” around them. The best thing you can do is be yourself. You can train beside them, you can shout out encouragement, you can lament similar experiences. You can let them know you have no idea what they are going through, but you will be there to support them. You can use them as motivation to conquer your own challenges. Its these types of authentic interactions that keep us feeling connected, that give us hope and a sense of always belonging. I love this gym and the extended family we have acquired through social media. Boxing knows no boundaries when it comes to community….we are far beyond these walls. Everyday, put aside a moment to think about yourself and others going through these difficult matches and know we all are in the ring sometimes and in the corner others. We are all taking on these matches together for the duration.
Until the next blog, Box On! And fist bumps to ya’ll